Rules To Live By

Life is not as difficult as people think; all one needs is a good set of rules. Since it is probably too late for you, here are some guidlines to pass on to your children.

1. Relax and take it easy. Dont get caught up in hollow conceits such as "doing something with your life." Such twaddle it out-moded and a sure formula for dissappointment.

2. Whatever it is you persue, try to do it just well enough to remain in the middle third of the field. Keep your thoughts and ideas to yourself and dont ask questions. Remember, the squeaky wheel is the first one to be replaced.

3. Size people up quickly, and develop rigid attitudes based on your first impression. If you try to delve deeper and get to "know" people, you're asking for trouble.

4. Dont fill for that superstitious nonsense about treating people the way you would want to be treated. It is a transparently narcissistic approach, and may be the sign of a weak mind.

5. Spend as much time as you can pleasing and impressing others, even if it makes you unhappy. Pay special attention to shallow manipulators who can do you the most harm. Remember, in the overall scheme, you count for very little.

6. Surround yourself wither inferiors and losers. Not only will you look good by comparison, but they will look up to you, and that makes you feel better.

7. Dont buy into the sentimental notion that everyone has short comings; its the surest way of undermining yourself. Remember, the really best people have no defects. If you're not perfect, something is wrong.

8. If by some off chance you do detect a few faults, first, accept the fact that you are probably deeply flawed. Then make a list of your faults and dwell on them. Carry the list around and try to think of things to add. Blame yourself for everything.

9. Beware of intuition and gut instincts, they are completely unreliable. Instead, develop preconceived notions and dont waver unless someone tells you to. Then change your mind and adopt their point of view. But only if they seem to know what they're talking about.

10. Never give up on an idea simply because it is bad and doesnt work. Cling to it even when it is hopeless. Anyone can cut and run, but it takes a very special person to stay with something that is stupid and harmful.

11. Always remember, today doesnt count. Trying to make something out of today only robs you of precious time that could be spent daydreaming or resting up.

12. Try to dwell on the past. Think of all the mistakes you've made, and how much better it would be if you hadnt made them. Think of what you should have done, and blame yourself for not doing so. And dont go easy. Be really hard on yourself.

13. If by chance you make a fresh mistake, especially a costly one, try to repeat it a few times so you become familiar with it and can do it easily int he future. Write it down. Put it with your list of faults.

14. Beware alo of the dangerous trap of looking ahead; it will only get you in trouble. Instead, try to drift along from day to day in a meandering fashion. Dont get sidetracked with some foolish "plan."

15. Finally, enjoy yourself all the time, and do whatever you want. Dont be seduced by that mindless chatter going around about "responsibility." Thats exactly the sort of thing that can ruin your life.


	Rules To Live By: Life is not as difficult as people think; all one needs is a good set of rules. Since it is probably too late for you, here are some guidlines to pass on to your children. 1. Relax and take it easy. Dont get caught up in hollow conceits such as "doing something with your life." Such twaddle it out-moded and a sure formula for dissappointment. 2. Whatever it is you persue, try to do it just well enough to remain in the middle third of the field. Keep your thoughts and ideas to yourself and dont ask questions. Remember, the squeaky wheel is the first one to be replaced. 3. Size people up quickly, and develop rigid attitudes based on your first impression. If you try to delve deeper and get to "know" people, you're asking for trouble. 4. Dont fill for that superstitious nonsense about treating people the way you would want to be treated. It is a transparently narcissistic approach, and may be the sign of a weak mind. 5. Spend as much time as you can pleasing and impressing others, even if it makes you unhappy. Pay special attention to shallow manipulators who can do you the most harm. Remember, in the overall scheme, you count for very little. 6. Surround yourself wither inferiors and losers. Not only will you look good by comparison, but they will look up to you, and that makes you feel better. 7. Dont buy into the sentimental notion that everyone has short comings; its the surest way of undermining yourself. Remember, the really best people have no defects. If you're not perfect, something is wrong. 8. If by some off chance you do detect a few faults, first, accept the fact that you are probably deeply flawed. Then make a list of your faults and dwell on them. Carry the list around and try to think of things to add. Blame yourself for everything. 9. Beware of intuition and gut instincts, they are completely unreliable. Instead, develop preconceived notions and dont waver unless someone tells you to. Then change your mind and adopt their point of view. But only if they seem to know what they're talking about. 10. Never give up on an idea simply because it is bad and doesnt work. Cling to it even when it is hopeless. Anyone can cut and run, but it takes a very special person to stay with something that is stupid and harmful. 11. Always remember, today doesnt count. Trying to make something out of today only robs you of precious time that could be spent daydreaming or resting up. 12. Try to dwell on the past. Think of all the mistakes you've made, and how much better it would be if you hadnt made them. Think of what you should have done, and blame yourself for not doing so. And dont go easy. Be really hard on yourself. 13. If by chance you make a fresh mistake, especially a costly one, try to repeat it a few times so you become familiar with it and can do it easily int he future. Write it down. Put it with your list of faults. 14. Beware alo of the dangerous trap of looking ahead; it will only get you in trouble. Instead, try to drift along from day to day in a meandering fashion. Dont get sidetracked with some foolish "plan." 15. Finally, enjoy yourself all the time, and do whatever you want. Dont be seduced by that mindless chatter going around about "responsibility." Thats exactly the sort of thing that can ruin your life.